Life Lessons on Leadership and Growth: A Father’s Advice

“Meaningless and unnecessary actions that weren't adding value to my portfolio nor my life - I was having experiences that weren't positive for my growth. I was a young boy with incredible vigour and talents. I could do almost anything. I won't necessarily blame myself because I believed my actions were going to be beneficial to my life goals not until I started seeing otherwise” - These were the words Stephen said to his son, Johnny, as he drove him off to the university that Saturday morning. 

His son had just gained admission into the University and he was to resume the following Monday. Stephen then decided to share his experience with him while they drove off to the university.

The goal of every undergraduate is to pursue academic excellence and graduate with flying colours and in the process, build capacities. Although every freshman isn't always after building capacities at their first attempts (well they're not always advised to do so). 

He continued, “As much as I was good at everything, exceptional grades weren't sure my thing. I had good grades, actually very good ones but I wasn't at the top of my class. After the realization of this, I decided to go on the path of student leadership where I learnt and unlearned about the different nature of humans. I thought I was naturally diplomatic until I entered the world of politics in school.”

This brought laughter to both Stephen and his son. He was really interested in hearing about his father's days in the university. 

Not wanting to keep him waiting, he continued his story - his greatest fears had been that his son would make the same mistakes he made while an undergraduate. 

Continuing, he said, “By the time I decided to join student leadership, I had to quit playing scrabble while I was the head of the team and even football too. I did all of these based on the instructions of my so-called political leaders. They saw the potential which I had already seen myself. I had a very high self-awareness and I'm sure you know that already”, he said to his son. Looking straight at him, he smiled and said, “I want you to possess the same ability because it will save you from a lot of backlashes which might result in low self-esteem. Well, I trust you”. He looked back at the road and both father and son smiled. 

“The whole student leadership thing started when I was in my second year. I had become quite popular in my department. Somehow along the way, I managed to garner people's attention and with it, came enemies - some that I wasn't even aware of; some of them being my closest friends. Maybe my friends that turned enemies were my fault though”.

Looking confused, Johnny asked him, “How, daddy?”

Chuckling at his son's question, he responded, “I made friends with a competitor. I was of the belief that our friendship shouldn't be put to the test of politics. Well, I was wrong. They were my friends and they knew I was way more capable than them. Hence, they became my enemies. I ran for the post of the senator representing my faculty and I won. That's why your Uncle Z still calls me Mr Senator”. 

“Ohh…”, realization dawned on Johnny’s face and alongside with it, came delight as to what his father was about to say next. 

Stephen continued, “Student leadership was very brutal. It made me revisit my choices of wanting to indulge myself in national leadership. There was so much plotting and planning going on against me and the highlight of it was when the student affairs unit of the school called my caucus leader and said a petition was against us that we were forming a group of cultists.”

He swallowed and continued, “The school was on the verge of rusticating everyone of us. We spent a whole lot of nights and days at the student affairs unit begging and pleading before the board of directors. My parents had already begun to worry because uncle Z had already informed them. It was at that point I began to contemplate dropping school leadership.”

Stephen and son finally arrived at the state-of-the-art edifice that was Johnny's new school. They made a stop at a cafeteria to get something to eat, when Johnny asked, “Did you really stop politics then? I still see a few politicians that come to visit our house though”.

He looked up at his son and responded, “Well, yes, after my second year, I dropped everything related to politics and tried to focus more on something else I could do better. 

But, in my third year, I met someone who was the son of a rich man, in fact the biggest oil mogul in the whole of the country. Since student leadership had stopped, I had plenty of time to myself which made me readily available. 

He was a nice and cool young man who always invited me to his home. But, after several attempts at turning him down, I visited his home for the first time. He introduced me to his dad who became interested in me and began asking questions about my background. I was a little bit scared because of my previous experiences and biases but despite all of that, I was truthful in all my responses. To cut the long story short, I started working for him at his company, where I learnt the business of oil - how it's being sold and transported.”

After graduation, due to my close friendship with my roommate, I became his assistant and he, the director of his father's company. The old man - Chief - like everyone loved to call him eventually died years after but as at that time, he had introduced me into the exclusive circles in politics. I also took a few more years working with my friend and learnt about the oil and gas industry after which I started mine.”

It was a rough ride at the inception but with prompt guidance and help from my friend, I began to grow my client base, connections and influence. Today, that connection I had built is what has expanded into what we now have and has made many political and influential figures to keep flocking to our home.”  

Looking straight at his son, Stephen said, “Your mother and I didn't raise you to become a tyrant or someone who acts without thinking it through. I know you love to take responsibility as a leader everywhere you find yourself but you must be ready to do all that it takes to be a great leader. Are you ready for that?”

Johnny's face became that of musing, thinking deeply and trying his best to understand everything his father had just told him. By then, they had arrived back at his school and he was ready, fully equipped to face the battles that might come his way in his sojourn through that land called a University. 

Leaving him with that question hanging, his father drove off. 

Dear reader, what do you think Johnny's response should be? Will his father's story hasten up his preparedness or will he hide in his shell and change who he is?